the broken coffee mug


June 2017



They claim you delineate sadness. They have told me to stay away from you because they think you are going to bring me sorrows. But I will not. I have always loved you and will continue doing so.

Ever since I was a kid, my eyes which dreamt of fairy tales coming true, have wanted you. I have searched for you all my life and found you at someone else’s wedding, away from the crowd, lonely at the gifts table. And you probably won’t believe this but the minute I saw you, visions of my dream wedding started floating in my conscience. It was love at first sight. I have let you stroke my hair, a privilege that even my mom was derived of. I have hugged you before going for my job interviews because you bring me good luck. I have daydreamed in your tranquil company while you apprehended my senses. I have stood before you in awe, fascinated  by your rustic charm and beauty. I have used your name to describe it when someone asked how my day was. And if that’s not love, then I don’t know what is. I have spent countless evenings in my balcony, watching you water my favourite flowers. I have snuggled with you on my bed at 2 a.m. while it rained outside. You have always been there, eager to listen, whenever I wanted to say something. And I cannot and will not let go of you just because they think that you are going to bring me sadness one day. And I have decided that you will be my happiness.

So here’s to my childhood obsession with blue eyes that all the princesses in the fairy tales had, my something “borrowed and blue” hairclip which I’m storing up for my dream wedding, my blue comb that I won in the ring game at the fair, my favourite blue pullover that I wore for my interviews, the clear blue sky of ’97 summer,  the blue post office building near the church that has delighted me since I was 5, the frequent blue days I had when I was an amateur artist, the blue watering can that my nana used to water the flowers, my favourite blue blanket and the notification panel and detail of Twitter and Facebook where I voice my opinions unreservedly. Here’s to you.

Thank you for always comforting me. Thank you for being the colour that has never held the meaning of sorrow for me and never let me down. Thank you, Blue.




​I’m half immersed in death

only my sight remains,

a portal to this world.

The world which has gifted me,

all shades of blues.

I take time

to immerse my other half in.

I want to take time.

But I’m running out of it, 

one thought at a time.

A swarm of thoughts engulf 

my petty brain.

Why don’t they leave me now?

What do they want now?

As my nostrils meet the water,

I take a last look at the world.

I give a last look to the world.

I see, for the last time.

I show my eyes to the world, for the last time. 

I try to memorise the pastels and bright hues of this world

Hoping to add them in my palette in some other world.

And so I am completely immersed.

-by Shambhavi 

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